Weight! Don’t do it!

1028160536This is the number I saw the morning after we got back from our vacation. I intentionally went against all good logic and advice of waiting until after things return to normal to weigh myself. I wanted to watch the daily ups and downs as my body realized I was no longer going to eat whatever I happened to feel like or be around at the moment (this is also NOT prescriptive, but I have to be honest with you about how my trip went).

Armed with my inflated weight of about 250, I had my annual physical yesterday. Just as a side note, I feel I’ve achieved mature adulthood because I actually have these every year now. I also met one of my goals for 2106 by getting my blood work done. I’ll be interested to see the results.

When it comes to my weight, I feel like I’ve been stuck on the second week of the Biggest Loser. You know what I mean. The one where everyone is excited because they lost 20 pounds the week before and are shocked to see that they only lost 5 (or 1 or gained a pound). Then, after a few seasons, we would all roll our eyes and ask if the contestants had ever watched the show.

While my weight is about the same as my last physical, I am happy to report a lower resting pulse of 73. For those playing along at home, that’s average on all the charts I’ve seen. That’s right folks: Average! Seriously, this is a big deal for someone who has a long record of failed fitness tests. Click the chart to go to the website for info for both men and women, but ignore the unsettling article.

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I had a blood pressure of 125/81. This is also an improvement, even if it still is on the pre-hypertension side of things. All in all, it was an encouraging doctor visit. Perhaps, my week 3…I mean, year 3 will come with more wins on the scale.

Feeling Weighed Down

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As promised, I’m here to share this morning’s weigh-in. I’ve also decided that any weigh-in post really needs to have “weigh” in the title, so be prepared to enjoy my cleverness until I run out of ideas.

I’m at either 246 or 249, depending on whether you believe the first or second time I weighed myself. I’m officially going with 249. I’m honestly feeling a bit embarrassed to share this, since this means I’ve gained about 15 pounds since mid-July. The good news is that some of this is as a result of a certain almost-7-year-old’s birthday treats. Going back to my normal eating will take away a few of these pounds pretty quickly.

I woke up this morning with a sore throat that I think is from my acid reflux. I have been feeling a bit blah lately, which means it’s even more important that I get some healthy habits in place asap.

I attempted to limit myself to one acid reflux/IBS trigger food this past week. Since caffeine is on that list, this involved singing to myself in the car about keeping my eyes open on the way to work multiple days in a row. I had 1/4 cup of coffee mixed with hot water and creamer a couple of times, and then there were the birthday treats. So, I had one…plus eight or so. I felt guilty about it, and then I felt guilty about feeling guilty since I know I shouldn’t. Oh, boy.

So, my next step is trying another week with one trigger food. Also, I signed up for a fun run with the kiddo for Friday, and it sounds like we might practice once or twice before that. I’ll let you know how it goes.

 

Scale Avoidance

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“I’m sorry. Do I know you? I’m so bad with names. Scale? Hmmm…I can’t quite recall.”

 

My weight has been creeping up the last couple of months. I only know this because I’ve weighed myself once this month and three times in August. I used to weigh myself often. Not daily, but I kept an eye on what was happening. I’ve also gone through phases of not weighing myself and using other types of measurement. I’ve measured inches, I’ve tracked food, and I’ve tracked my habits. All have been associated with a fairly similar downward trend on the scale.

When there is no measurement of any kind, though, I’m on a slippery slope. If going about my business without a thought worked for me, I would not be writing this blog. I’ve been in denial, and it’s time to pay closer attention to how I’ve been taking care of myself. It might not be pretty at first, but that’s better than throwing away all my progress. I think I need to start posting my weight more. So, I guess I’ll see you all tomorrow.

“It’s nice to meet you, Scale. Let me introduce you to my friends.”

 

My Own Little White World – Part 1

My Story

Hanging with the cousins – I’m the one in the blue dress, my sister is behind me, and my brother is in the bottom left corner.

As I read my Facebook and Twitter, I see many different perspectives on race and how it fits into our lives. In my heart, I know I have a lot to say about this topic, but I wonder what can I add to the conversation. All I can do is share my story. For those expecting to see a weight loss blog entry, please bear with me (my weigh-in this morning was 236.2 pounds in case you’re interested). As a blog writer, I’m convinced it would be a tragedy to say nothing. I have a small platform, but it’s time for me to step up to it.

As a Christian, I believe that every part of me and every part of you was intricately designed by God. Much of a Christian’s life seems to be spent figuring out what it means to live faithfully where He’s placed us, whether it is race, gender, culture, socioeconomic status, country of origin, time in history, family, skills, or personality. We serve a creative, intentional God who shows His glory in His creation. If you love God, please take the time to notice the beauty in the diversity of the people He created in His image. I beg you to spend time getting to know people who are different from you and try to see the world from their perspective. If not, you are missing out on seeing the goodness of God from so many different angles.

This is where I’m coming from, but how did I get here? It’s a long story, so I will only share part of it today. Everyone has an entry point to their development of racial identity. Mine was to working class white parents in a suburb of Indianapolis. They attended a fiercely independent Baptist church,  and they home schooled. In some ways, this set me up to be…let’s say quirky. It also set me up to be okay with standing against widespread beliefs and questioning how society and the church in America works.

My mom grew up in the southwest and had a daughter from a previous marriage to a Navajo man. My dad’s family moved from France to the hill country of Missouri and sang blue grass and Southern gospel together at their family gatherings. My dad adopted my sister when he married my mom, so I was born with an 11 year old sister who was half Navajo and half white and a 2 and a half year old brother who was white.

From birth, I had a role model who had darker skin, hair, and eyes than I did. I am aware that not everyone has this opportunity. When I was old enough to be mobile, I was the annoying little sister who sat outside her big sister’s locked door crying because I wanted to spend every second with her. When I started getting dolls, I wanted the white dolls with blonde hair, but I also wanted the black dolls (I don’t remember seeing any Latina, Asian or Native American dolls at the stores then).

Just having a biracial sister did not mean I was an instant expert on race, but it did mean that my impressions of people of other races started early in my life. Other than the usual sibling drama, these daily impressions were positive. It was through these lenses that I interpreted the things that I saw and heard people say. We’ll get to that next time.

 

Sweet Scale Success!

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As much as I love the idea of hanging in there and doing my best when I’m not losing weight, it can get a little exhausting. After three months of the scale hovering around the same number, it’s finally heading down! This morning, I weighed in at 235.2 pounds. I’m soooo close to the huge milestone of 40 pounds lost. To give you some perspective, I’ve been working on this chunk of 10 pounds for the last 6 months.

I’m really enjoying my week off of all goals. I’m not going crazy and throwing all caution to the wind. I’m still making healthy choices for the most part; I spent an hour digging in the garden today and picked a 100 calorie Greek yogurt for an evening snack. I’ll pick up a couple of goals on Monday, but until then I’m drinking in the sweet freedom.

Turkey sausage at last!

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The life cycle of a sausage is not a glamorous one, so I will spare you the gory details (believe me when I say that I mean that literally). Tonight’s dinner was three days in the making (one for grinding the meat, one for stuffing the sausage, and one for cooking the sausage…more days if you count the turkey thawing in the refrigerator). It was my first attempt at sausage, and it was a definite success. Of course, pork would have been juicier, but the turkey was free and lower in calories. I made two flavors: barbecue bacon cheddar and red chile cilantro.

I’m also keeping myself busy reading up on gardening. Other than a tomato plant or two, I’ve never had a garden in my adult life. I have no clue what I’m doing, but I’m excited for the extra physical activity and some cheap/delicious fruits and veggies (hopefully). The first step is clearing out a whole lot of debris from my not-so-well-groomed backyard. As with most things I want to do, I’ve found a good gardening podcast called A Way to Garden by Margaret Roach.

March Goals Check-In: I’ve been feeling pretty good with my new eating habits (avoiding the chocolate and coffee, mainly). Unfortunately, it hasn’t gone as well with the no scale thing. I stuck it out through my first 6 week check-in (237.2 pounds – my lowest yet) and then weighed myself every day after that for several days. I’m staying away from the scale again until May, so I’ll have to find something else to write about in April when I do the A to Z blog challenge.

 

No Scale? No Problem.

0301161952.jpgThis is my scale. You may recognize it from the main picture on my blog. We’ve spent a lot of time together. We hang out a few times a week, at least. Sometimes, every day. My scale seems to be pretty important when  it comes to my goals. I want to lose weight (about 65 more pounds, probably). The name of my blog even has “Weight Loss” in it. How do you measure weight loss? You got it: a scale.

Even with all of this considered, I’m planning to back off from weighing myself as much. In fact, I’m cutting back to only 6-week check-ins. There are a few reasons I’m doing this.

  • My main goals involve being healthier, moving easier, and, if I’m being honest, being a bit smaller. While this is related to my weight, the scale isn’t really going to tell me if these things are happening. Instead, I’ll be focusing on whether I’m improving in these areas.

 

  • I tend to get side tracked when the scale doesn’t say what I’d like or when I see other people getting results on the scale by doing things that just wouldn’t work for me.

 

  • For some reason, I am a big fan of novelty. Think giant clothespins, sriracha mango yogurt, or the tiny book charms my husband bought me for Valentine’s Day. Aren’t they amazing?!

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I like trying new things, so I want to see what happens if I try not weighing myself for a while. You never know when the world will suddenly run out of batteries or when you will be stranded on a desert island with no scales in sight. It’s best to be prepared.

 

 

My Six-Week Check-In

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As I have been losing weight, I’ve been using a weight loss tracking tool from the Half Size Me website. I made a chart from my nine six-week check-ins to get a visual, and it’s a beauty! If I made a chart of every time I stepped on the scale, it would look more like this:

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Taking a step back and seeing the overall trend is so encouraging. It’s so easy to get trapped in a comparison game, since there were a lot of people who started around the same time I did and have lost a lot more weight. Ultimately, I don’t want my journey to be about me anyway, even though that’s the message I get from everyone everywhere. What matters is where my heart is and what my priorities are as I follow Jesus. When I make anything about me, things fall apart. I just have to remind myself to compare myself with where I was back around the end of December and where I was six weeks ago, and where I was yesterday.

30 Less Than 30

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30 – 30 = 245

Okay, so that probably didn’t make sense. Let’s try that again.

My weight at age 30 (275 pounds) – 30 pounds (the amount of weight I’ve lost) = 245 pounds (my current weight)

That’s right, folks. I’ve hit the big 3-0 just a few days after my 31st birthday. That’s twice the weight of the kettlebell I used during my strength training workout today (see above). For another frame of reference, that’s the same weight at the giant burrito mentioned here. It’s also around the same weight as several of the dog breeds mentioned here.

It took me longer than I hoped (I missed my goal twice). It took a lot of work. I still have a long way to go. Yada, yada, yada. Who cares?! I lost 30 pounds!

Weigh-in Day! – 9/10/15 (Downs and Ups and Downs)

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Previous weight: 247.8 (8/13/15)

Current weight: 246.6

Total weight lost: 28.4

When you see these numbers, you might reasonably assume that I have slowly lost a pound over the last month. What really happened? I’ve actually lost a pound, gained four, and lost three…or something like that. All I know is that my weight looked more like a zigzag than a straight line down.

What is really encouraging to me, though, is that my normal today is so different from my normal eight months ago. Routines change, stress goes up and down (let’s be honest, mostly up), and motivation comes and goes. However, my health is closer to the top of my priority list. It might not always be as high as it should be, but it wasn’t even on my radar last December.

Life is crazy, and sometimes it makes me want to dive head first into a vat of chocolate. This morning, though, I was satisfied with my fresh fruit, yogurt, and coffee with some creamer and chocolate syrup. As time goes on, I’m hoping for more days like today and only an occasional vat of chocolate.